New group aims to get moms and newborns out of the house
Organizers aim to tackle loneliness with weekly events
For Elbonita McNally, motherhood is a joyful time in life. But time away from work and friends can also be hard.
“Motherhood is amazing, but the days are sometimes long. And it is a bit isolating and lonely, and there’s only so much you can do at home,” said McNally.
McNally, who gave birth to her son Ari, found the group called Mat Leave Moms through a friend and joined two months ago. She says the support she has received has been invaluable.
“It’s a wonderful group of women … Sometimes I say I feel like it’s the only reason I haven’t gotten depressed,” she said.
McNally said she looks forward to the group’s events, held all over the Halifax area each Wednesday.
A recent event in mid-November was a Sip and Stroll. Group members went for a walk along the Salt Marsh Trail in Cole Harbour and a drink at the North Brewing taproom in Dartmouth. On Nov. 20, organizers Shannon Lynn and Kathryn Trovato hosted a holiday party for the group at Fledglings & Folk. Moms brought toys for the Canadian Tire-sponsored Move 100 Toy Drive in Lower Sackville.
Lynn and Trovato try to support local and give back to the community when they can. One of the ways they do this by stopping at local breweries like Propeller after their strolls.
They also don’t charge the moms for event tickets because they know from experience that maternity leave doesn’t provide a lot of money.
The group was created on July 30 so new moms could meet and talk with other new mothers every week. The group originally started with three people, Lynn, Trovato, and their friend Natasha. After posting on Instagram, it took off with other moms wanting to join.
They began with their weekly Sip and Strolls, which attract about 15-25 moms each week at various trails throughout the municipality. Their Instagram account now has 730 followers, and, according to Lynn, their events can have up to 40 moms, plus their babies.
With the group’s rapid growth, businesses in the city have offered to partner with it. Their Moms Night Out event will be hosted at the Halifax Marriott Harbourfront Hotel on Dec. 5.
“It was overwhelming. I was freaking out, thinking ‘Can we handle this?’ ” said Lynn.
“But we just saw such a value in it. And we saw that other moms were loving it too,” said Trovato. “(They) just wanted to get out and have people that they can relate to, talk to, spend time with, and not feel any pressure or judgment.”
Rebecca Dort, a member of the group, said it feels rewarding when moms get out of the house with their little ones. And when they meet up with the group, they feel welcomed by all the women.
Dort and Courtney Frost said it’s comforting talking with women who are at all different stages with their kids. The two friends said they can get advice and know they aren’t alone in what they are going through.
“We do check up on each other. And we have that community because sometimes you lose friends because of different priorities. So, it’s nice knowing someone that has those same priorities,” said Frost.
Stephanie Allen said she had the same experience because many of her friends don’t have kids.
“It’s nice to expand a circle that does have kids because we can relate to each other in a different way,” said Allen. “You don’t fully understand what parenthood entails, the exhaustion, and the level of commitment until you experience it firsthand. So, it definitely changes your social dynamics with previous friends.”
Research suggests parents without someone to share their experience can feel bad about themselves as parents and can get lonely. It also suggests parental loneliness affects parent and child health.
Allen also explained that her experience with her second baby has been less isolating because of the group. Allen had her first child in 2020 during the COVID-19 pandemic. She said that it was a very challenging time and mentally stressful.
“It’s been a lot more positive mental health-wise because of having a structure throughout my week and having something to look forward to. I think just having that routine is important for her (her baby) and for me,” said Allen.
Lynn and Trovato said they have no plans on stopping because they love what their events can do for moms.
“(After their events) we’re on a high. It’s really sweet, especially because we are second-time moms, we remember what it was like,” said Lynn. “It’s just nice to be able to share more stories with people and advice and see what works for others.”